That time Peter Parker was trained by Natasha Romanoff.
It’s a spider thing
It’s a spider thing
Don’t you love how Peter can do it with his calves but Natasha has to use her inner thighs. This whole equality thing is great.
Thighs are stronger than calves, and you can get a tighter grip, as well as have a higher chance of breaking things. Peter was intending to disarm, Natasha was ready to kill. Natasha is a trained assassin, and Peter is a student who works for a newspaper.
Given their backgrounds and experiences, it would be UNequal to have Peter using skills and disarming tactics that Natasha was trained to do so.
So yes, this whole equality thing is great.
This post is brilliant.
also peter has bALLS OK you dont want to SLAM YOUR FUCKING TESTICLES into someons fucking SKULL
Reblogging for last comment. Laughing for 3257865 years
And just because you’re an extra-nutty cookie, here’s some advice from someone who’s learning to do that.
Natasha’s move was technically perfect. The move is meant to to be an amped up flying triangle choke; krav, judo and a couple MMA disciplines have it.
What you want is your opponent’s head and upper arm crushed between your legs, with the one leg extended and the other at a triangle, wrapped around their throat cutting off circulation,
Doing it with your calves is possible, but not actually effective, there’s simply not as much pressure; doing it with your calves because you can’t get your thighs into the proper position is just asking to get your ass beat by the other fighter, because he is better than you.
Natasha Romanoff just exercised a move that would have her opponent unconscious in 6-10 seconds.
Spiderman was ][ that close to getting his dick bit clean off.
Maybe the next time you try to talk shit, sweetheart, know the shit first.
I took my girlfriend to an improv show the other night and during intermission we were passionately arguing over whether half a 5 Hour Energy shot would give you 2.5 hours of energy or 5 hours of half-assed energy so we turned around to ask the opinions of the three people behind us and one of them said “Are all your arguments like this because we heard you in the lobby earlier fighting over the right way to pronounce ‘egg’?”
S.H.I.E.L.D.’s public relations department decides to take nice photos of the Avengers so that they can send them to the media whenever the team goes public. They somehow manage to convince Thor to put on normal clothes and get through the photoshoots pretty quickly.
Except Tony wouldn’t stop preening and duck facing. They eventually gave up and used the “best” one. To this day, Tony still gets the stink eye from the head of PR.
I also accept this headcanon